I’ve heard some say ”you’re not broken, you’re…”
To be honest, I don’t even know how that ends. Because the truth is, we’re all a little (or a lot) broken. We live this thing called life. And guess what? It’s not perfect. It can be really ugly at times. And it will break us at some point. And then watches to see how, or if we put ourselves back together.
And therein lies the beauty. We get to choose how we react to that brokenness. We get to decide if we let ourselves completely crumble and lay on the ground like poor broken Humpty Dumpty, or if we get up and piece ourselves together like beautiful broken Japanese pottery that’s been patched with gold.
We are all broken to some extent. But those cracks get filled with gold (if we allow them to be). They allow us to shine. To teach what we’ve learned through our hardships and to help others in the process. They make us relatable. Because I don’t know about you, but there is no way I could ever relate to someone who puts there life out there like it’s perfect. I don’t even trust someone who appears to live a perfect life. You know why? It doesn’t exist.
Being broken is not a bad thing. It just means we’ve been through trials. It means we’ve been knocked down and have had to find our way back up. It means we’re human and we’ve lived a little life.
It builds us. It’s part of us. It makes us who we are.
Being broken is nothing to be ashamed of. To me, it’s the exact opposite. It’s your chance to say, yeah I’ve been through this and made it out. Stronger, shinier, better, and ready to help others going through it now.
Broken isn’t shameful y’all, it’s beautiful. Embrace all your brokenness and hold your head high. You made it!
Limiting beliefs…we hear that term a lot these days. But what exactly does that mean? What are limiting beliefs? Can we overcome them or are they a forever thing?
Let me first say, they are absolutely overcomeable (if you didn’t know that was a word, you do now). I know this because I’ve overcome so many self-limiting beliefs and continue to do so on a daily basis.
So what are self-limiting beliefs? Anything you tell yourself, that you believe to be truth, that holds you back. The things you tell yourself that keep you from moving forward toward your big scary goals. The things that keep you from being the person you could be, and likely are meant to be. We can truly be so mean to ourselves. But why? And when do these things start?
You guys, we didn’t start out with this kind of thinking. If we did we’d never learn to talk and walk. Seriously, I didn’t tell myself, “you’ll never be able to say that word right, so don’t even bother” or “you’re going to fall as soon as you try to move away from that couch. Don’t do it!” Y’all! These thoughts didn’t cross my mind when I was a baby and they didn’t cross yours either. But look what we did! We learned to talk. We learned to walk. We did it!
So, why is it so hard to have that kind of belief in ourselves now? Chances are you’ve failed at something at this point in life. Like really good. Like impossible at this point that you haven’t. Somehow when we fail at something we begin to beat ourselves up and allow ourselves to believe it means we are incapable of accomplishing whatever it is we’re trying to accomplish. (This is when you go back and get a pep talk from baby you about getting up and trying again.)
There’s also a really good chance others have said some not so nice things to you. And unfortunately that whole “sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” isn’t really true. Words do hurt. And it can be so much harder to heal from mean words than it can be to heal from a broken bone.
We go through life collecting all these negative beliefs and words about ourselves. And we tend to hold onto them and let them build. Before long we believe them as if they are the God’s honest truth. But here’s the thing y’all, they’re not!
Our truth is exactly what we make it to be. If we believe without a doubt we will fail and not be able to come back to accomplish that scary thing, we will fail and not come back to accomplish it. If we believe there’s a chance we will fail but we push through anyway, knowing we will get back up and keep trying like our amazing baby selves would, we will!
Our minds believe everything we tell them! Tell them all the good things. Feed them with all the personal development. Surround yourself with people who believe in you and lift you up. Follow the inspiring people on social media. Be good to you! Never tell yourself something you wouldn’t tell your best friend. Build yourself up and love on you like you would on those you want so badly to see succeed.
Ok, I’ll step off my soapbox now. I could seriously go on and on about this. I’m slightly passionate about helping you believe in yourself. ;)
I’m a true believer that whether you believe you can or you can’t, you’re right.
I apply this to all aspects of life. Our minds believe everything we tell them. Have you ever noticed that some people seem to get ahead more easily, or always seem happier or healthier in spite of any obstacles or limitations that may seem to exist for them? Or found yourself surprised that someone isn’t as fit, happy, or successful as you would expect?
Ever wonder why that is? It ultimately comes down to mindset.
I’ve been told more than once I don’t fit the mold of a person living with fibromyalgia. I live a fairly normal and active lifestyle. It’s because I made that choice right from the start. I decided when I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia, at the age of 19, that I wouldn’t let it stop me. I continued with that mindset after a freak fall and hip injury in February 2018. It doesn’t mean it’s always easy. I have my days of frustration. But I refuse to let it keep me down. I refuse to let these things dictate my life for me.
I have fibromyalgia. It does not have me.
See how that works? If you decide limitations and obstacles in life own you, you’re right. Your mind will give up looking for solutions. Your body will stop working to its fullest potential. You’ll end up feeling defeated. Because you told yourself in the beginning that you were.
I’ll say it again. Our minds believe everything we tell them. Make sure you’re filling yours with all things good and hopeful, and reminding yourself that you’re ultimately in charge.
This doesn’t mean it will always be easy (I mentioned that above). It doesn’t mean your body will always respond and do 100% of the things you want it to do. But it does mean that you’ll learn to listen. You’ll learn that your limitations are not what defines you. You’ll learn what your body is truly capable of. And you’ll learn that you’re winning at life. Because you are in control.
Motivation. We’ve all struggled with it, right? And if you’re like me, 2020 has made it especially hard to find motivation and keep it.
I recently asked in my free online group for fibro warriors what the biggest struggle was when it comes to managing health. Motivation was a big one! It can be hard to want to do much when you’re body aches and you can’t think clearly. Making changes, even if for the better, can feel so overwhelming and like too much work. I get it!
So, I thought I’d offer a few tips. Word to the wise though...motivation only works when you put the work in. It’s not always going to be easy, but it will be worth it. But let me see if I can take a little of the work and overwhelm out of it for you.
A few things you can do to get and stay motivated.
Find your why. Why do you want to get and stay healthy? Make a list and keep it where you’ll see it daily. If you don’t know why you want to take the steps to improve your health, motivation is definitely not going to be there.
Dig out an outfit you want to fit into but can’t. Don’t have one? Buy one. Seriously. I’m not saying it will work on its own, but it will help you keep focus on the direction you want to go. So, give it a try.
That being said...take baby steps. Don’t go crazy and dig out (or buy) something 5 times too small. Even if that’s your goal. Make small goals that will eventually lead you to that big goal. Same goes for nutrition. Don’t jump in all at once. Cut out soda first. Then creamer in your coffee. Move onto cutting out all added sugars and processed foods. You get the idea. Baby steps.
Ask yourself who needs you at your best. Who will benefit from you living a healthier life? I read a book earlier this year, High Performance Habits. The author suggests placing a post-it note with the question, “Who needs me on my A game right now?” where you’ll see it daily. I’m going to say there’s a good reason for him making this suggestion. Maybe give it a try. It just might help.
Keep focus on your end goal. How do you feel now vs how you want to feel? This will kind of tie your why and your goal together. Stay focused. Take the steps to get there in small chunks. And know that if you don’t give up, you’ll reach that end goal.
Know you’re not alone. Find a support group or person. Accountability and encouragement from those you know truly have your best interest at heart goes a long way. You’re welcome to join my free grouphere.
Have more motivation tips to add? I’d love to hear ‘em!
30 days of thankfulness. It’s something I’ve done every November for the last 10 years or so. I’ve always believed in leading with a thankful heart. I’ve always believed that there is always something to be thankful for. I believe it’s more important now than ever to be able to find the good in every day.
2020 has been a year for the books for sure. Depression and anxiety have been on the rise. Not surprising. People have lost jobs, become sick with an illness that no one seems to understand, been kept from loved ones and, in some cases, lost loved ones. Finding the good can be extra hard in times like this.
But it’s so so important that we do. The negative is staring us in the face this year. It’s everywhere we look. But what if we shifted our minds to find the good? Whatever it may be.
The blue sky. The sunshine. The beautiful snowfall. Being able to spend more time with our loved ones at home. The fact that our pets love having us home more. Time to finally get a workout in. Our favorite ice cream. That cup of coffee. The online support group we may not have otherwise found.
You guys, there is so so much to be thankful for. The big and small things. Learn to look for those things and appreciate them on a daily basis. You’ll find you’re thankful you did (see, another thing to add to the list).
I invite you to join me this year in 30 days of thankfulness. (Even if you’re jumping in after the first. It’s never too late!) And then carry this mindset through the rest of the year and into the next.
The negative things will be pointed out to you enough. There’s no need to spend time focusing on them and finding your own negativity to add to it. So, let’s do this! Let’s fill our minds with all the good things!
Need a little help in resetting your mindset? Check out my free group here for a 3 week mindset challenge.
